


So What If I'm Into You?

by HalfnHalf



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M, alternate universe brojohn, hopefully funny conversations but possibly not, it happened it's a thing i promise, john is an actor now, no sburb
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-12-14
Updated: 2012-12-16
Packaged: 2017-11-21 02:44:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/592560
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HalfnHalf/pseuds/HalfnHalf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You don't know what your intentions for the evening were but you're pretty sure it wasn't this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah, okay. Hi this is the first BroJohn thing I've written. I hope it's truly spectacular.
> 
> Starring John I'mnotahomoIjustlikeyou Egbert and Bro (Dirk) IjustreallylikeyoubutitskindaweirdIguess Strider.
> 
> Co-starring Whyarepesterlogssohardtowrite Andeditin.

TT: When are you coming home?  
TT: I realize you've only been out for.  
TT: A half hour.  
TT: Yes I just checked.  
TT: Can't you just come home yet.  
TT: ... Please.

You're not sure how the night ended up like this. You're really not. You do know, however, that you have just spent the last half hour alone, shoveling pudding into your mouth - fuck Dave in every orifice he had pudding _was so_ food. Except not literally because you'd really not like to think about anyone fucking Dave, ever. That'd be a place in your thoughts that you'd like to avoid.

Half way through your moping, you realize you're being pathetic but you really can't bring yourself to care, you get a message. You hear the familiar noise, and you expect it to be Dave; 'oh sure bro lemme just get in my car right now and ditch the chick and come home to you so that you can cry to me about how much you missed me oh yes thatd be perfect'. But it's not.

ectoBiologist [EB] began pestering timaeusTestified [TT]

EB: hey bro! i uh, heard from dave.  
EB: told me to tell you to stop messaging him because he's really busy!!  
EB: but i'd really not like to think about what he's busy with, because okay, maybe he's getting some.  
EB: i just don't think i want to visualize my best friend having sex.  
EB: anyway. i'm here to check up on you.  
TT: It's so nice that someone here appreciates the fact that I am a living, breathing being.  
TT: In other words that he shouldn't have thrown his own brother away to go on a shitty date.  
TT: He just wanted to get laid.  
EB: i think you're being a little...  
EB: melodramatic?  
TT: You don't understand, Egbert.  
TT: It's lonely in this shit apartment.  
TT: I'm happy for him and all.  
TT: Just not used to being alone on a Friday night.  
TT: Friday night was always our night, y'know? Bro and Lil Man night.  
EB: yeah, i know.  
EB: he used to tell me stories about the games of monopoly you guys would play.  
EB: speaking of which, you should let me join sometime!!  
EB: i mean i know it's like family night or whatever but.  
EB: i just think it'd be fun??  
EB: anyway i'll be right back i just got home and a warm bath is screaming my name impatiently.  
EB: i'm cold okay.

ectoBiologist [EG] ceased pestering timaeusTestified

TT: Wait.  
TT: Take me with you.

But he doesn't, and you're stuck alone to watch your shitty television soap operas for another half hour while you wait for him to come back, and when he does, he's back to talking to you again.

You don't really talk about much. You do, however, talk about how it would take hundreds of dollars to get him from his house to yours every friday for game night. You also talk about how it would take hundreds of dollars just to go out there for one night to cuddle him.

You don't mind the thought of that, actually. The cuddling. Not the cost of the cuddling. You know, technically, that either one of you could afford it, however.

Fairly certain that with his and your careers both doing well, you could very easily go see him whenever you want. The thought of that makes you way happier than it probably shoud. On one hand, you're very annoyed by that. On the other hand, you play it cool, tell yourself you don't care. Because obviously you don't.

EB: oh, come on, bro!  
EB: you can't fool me that way!  
EB: obviously there's something on your mind.  
EB: but i guess i can't make you tell me anyway.  
EB: okay i'm going to stop rambling at you now even though you haven't responded yet.  
EB: see how thoughtful i am.

You didn't expect to come back to that. Not even quite sure what you came back from, honestly. Some sort of lame ass mindtrip and you're pretty fucking sure that wasn't meant to happen but looky here, it did, it fucking happened, you just stared at your wall lost in thought for fifteen fucking minutes only to have your phone vibrate furiously at you.

TG: im on my way home now  
TG: jesus dicks you talk a lot when you get lonely  
TG: anyway i just got in the car and fuck that  
TG: im not gonna text and drive that shits dangerous   
TT: Glad I taught you so well, Dave. So glad. Anyway, yeah, see you soon.

You don't close out of his window and you don't close out of John's window but you don't answer it just yet, because at least if you wait you'll have the excuse that you've been talking to Dave and waiting for him to come home. Sounded good to you.

Maybe you'll even get the gross details from the date which you don't even _want_. Okay well, maybe you do. Just a little. You always find yourself curious to see what kind of sex life Dave has, just because you want to make sure you gave him proper values. But you're not going to ask, and he's probably not going to tell you. And you don't see the point in thinking about this so _why are you still doing it._

The sound of a key jiggling inside a lock and ten minutes later, Dave stands in front of you and he looks like he wants to punch you and cry into your shoulder all at once. 

"How'd your date go?" And he falls onto the couch next to you and covers his face and it's so hard to tell how he's feeling because he's got this pout going on, but he's always got this pout going on, but this is like a different kind of pout. And you just don't know.

There's a slight pause, and then he looks over at you and you can't see eachother's expressions except you see his pout and you think you're smiling so he probably sees that. "I don't think I'm ever going to go out in public again." He admits, and you raise a bro but he doesn't take notice, so you question him, just mumble a 'hm?' and he's babbling fast enough that if words were horses, he'd be first place in some shitty race right about now.

"Well, first of all. When we got there, the spot I'd reserved wasn't actually reserved for some fucking godawful reason, and it was just. Bad. All in all, bad. Then, a waiter walked passed and knocked over a candle and I almost got set on fire and somehow I took the blame for that-- don't look at me I wasn't in the mood to fight them. Then I might have mentioned something about my brother running and internet pornsite, and, oh, how the ladies love that. I didn't know what to talk about so I just blabbered on, and she let me, and oh my god, I'm just going to stay at home and be a hermit forever." He slides down, hands still covering his face, except now he's running them down his face in hopes to show his utter _anguish_. You know that.

"Did you even get to eat?" You watch him shake his head, and then you pull him up, and to the car. "McDonald's it is."

You're still not sure how you ended up spending thirty dollars on just the two of you.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You're pretty sure you're not supposed to be feeling this about an amateur actor/college student.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look I wrote another chapter. Slightly sappier and with ten percent more creepy Bro.  
> Slow claps for me.  
> Thank you for the comments and kudos!  
> They're much appreciated!

After a night filled with cheeseburgers - double cheeseburgers because _cmon bro we cant skimp out on the extra patty this is like the perfect time to have extra meat to get rid of my woes_ , as well as having them the next few days, you finally convince him that _everyone_ has bad dates, and yes, that does include you. He's skeptical about that because as much as he knows that your asshole and douchebag thing is pretty much an act half the time, he knows the other half of you actually is 120% douchebag. 

"Well no shit, everyone has bad dates. I'm not like, some shitty robot made for dating or something, I promise." And you smirk at him somewhat and he's rolling his eyes at you, sitting on the chair across the room from you on a Tuesday afternoon.

After a minute or two, he gets up, and sighs - going to get ready for work. "Yeah. Okay, I get it. What was your worst date, then?" 

You freeze, and he knows oh man, this is going to be a good story. "Alright, alright. So once when I was fifteen, I brought a girl home to my house, right. I know this sounds bad. But, all I had planned was a nice dinner. We get there and she starts taking off her clothes and then she tells me she's twenty, and I freaked out. I actually started crying, because I wasn't ready for that shit." And he's laughing at you which is okay, you guess, because it's better than him having that dumb pout.

Dave heads off to work with a smile on his face, the first big one in a few days, and you relax into the couch before rolling over to lay on your stomach, and pulling your laptop out in front of you, hitting the power button and staring down at it.

If it were a month or two prior, you would have just slept. But now, now. Now you've got this addiction. This itch that needs scratching. A hunger that needs filling. The addiction, that hunger, is John. John fucking Egbert. That also happens to be the name of the appetizer, the main course, and the dessert. Actually, maybe not dessert. Yet. 

timeausTestified began pestering ectoBiologist

TT: Okay, the bird has flown the coop.  
TT: And by that I mean our dearest Dave has finally gone back to work after two days of pretending to be sick.  
TT: He also smiled again. Like a real smile.   
TT: Are you even there because if you're busy I could just leave you alone.   
EB: yeah, sorry. studying for finals. gotta love those finals, right?  
EB: robotics finals, actually.   
EB: i'm really bad at it, but I really like it. is that weird?

 

 

You spend the next four hours helping him via video call. You spend those four hours pretending that you're there, pretending your arms are around him, pretending that you're together. 

He pulls you out of your thoughts after five minutes. "Bro? Are you still present up there? Yoohoo, earth to Bro." John's actually waving an flailing his hands back and forth, and you're pretty certain it's one of the cutest things you've seen in ages. 

A small sighs comes out, and you nod. "Yeah... I'm... Yeah. What do you wanna do now that you're done studying?" And maybe you're wrong to imply that he'd want to talk to you other than what he needs you for.

But his face doesn't twist, he doesn't look appalled at all, even. He looks happy. Happy you still want to talk to him, you hope. Except that's stupid and that's dumb because you always want to talk to him. But you don't think you're ready to tell him that yet. And you're pretty certain he doesn't want to hear that yet.

 

 

A few hours and two online board games later, he's falling asleep. You think about how if he were here, instead of on a video call with you, you would have wrapped your arms around him and maybe kissed his forehead and you would have told him, "Hey John, I like you." But he wasn't here, and you couldn't tell him yet anyway, you didn't have the balls for that and you hated it mostly because it was the truth.

So instead you say, "Go to bed," and you're pretty sure you slipped a cutie in there, but you're not sure about that, either. You'd moved to your bed not too long ago, and you're falling asleep too, and it's almost like he's there with you when he says _i'm fine!!_ and then he falls asleep anyway and so do you, you just fall asleep on call with him right like that.

 

 

The calling thing became a regular occurrence. As in, almost every night Dave goes to work, John gets this shy little act for a few minutes before slyly slipping in that maybe he needs your help or, he's lonely, or maybe he wants to talk about something and he just _trusts you_.

So you do talk. About everything. You talk about life and death and sleeping and being awake and then you get to talking about feelings and that scares you a lot, but also excites you.

TT: Can I ask you something?   
EB: yeah!! it's weird because normally i always ask you things??  
EB: but um, sure.   
TT: I'm not really sure how to word this.  
TT: But it's been on my mind for awhile, I guess.  
TT: Has there ever been someone you cared for more than you probably should?  
TT: Maybe for moral reasons or something?  
TT: And the way that you care about them is... Not the way you're expected to, or something?  
TT: ... Sorry, that sounds really weird.   
TT: You don't have to answer.   
EB: uh...  
EB: no, uh.  
EB: yeah? i guess so??  
EB: ... have you ever felt more comfortable with someone than you should?   
TT: Yeah. There's actually been... Someone who's on my mind a lot. Recently.   
EB: hm...   
TT: Yeah?   
EB: nah, nothing.   
EB: nevermind.

You're both kind of weird after that for the next few days. Afraid to start conversations and afraid for it to end up that awkward, but you always find yourself wondering what he was going to say.

You'd actually like it a lot if you could get him to tell you, you realize. Maybe it's something along the lines of what you feel to him, and you know you'd love that. More than you probably should.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise you'll see the end of the conversation later.

**Author's Note:**

> Wow, okay. So this is kinda short? Sorry about that. But here you go, and uh. Enjoy and shit?
> 
> Also there's going to be more interaction in the second chapter I promise. And I also promise this story has a direction. Okay? Yeah. uvu


End file.
